So, I live in one of what is considered the most desired places in the United States. Los Angeles, California! You’d totally think I’d have tons of friends and my life was perfect, right? Wrong! Due to my current job, which I don’t want to discuss right now (someday soon, I will), it’s hard for me to make friends! The reason it’s challenging isn’t because I’m not sociable or that I’m awkward.. it’s simply because my job is isolating. The job hardly allows me to interact with people unless I go out of my way to do so. I’ve had the same job since I graduated college in 2015 and meeting people with similar interests has been a struggle. I’ve never let my isolating job stop me from doing things I want to do though! After I got over the fear of going places alone, I began to realize how awesome it is to still do things I enjoy with and for myself.
Recently, I went to see a band called Uncle Acid & The Deadbeats at this huge venue and stood close to the front all by myself! I made a couple of friends while there too. Before I take myself out on a date, there are a few “rituals” or things I do that help me feel like I’m gonna have a good time! Basically, I romanticize everything I’m doing for myself as I would if I was being picked up or taken out for a date. Everyone’s ideal of romance is a little different but things like taking care & treating myself make me feel amazing. Do whatever works for you if you’re trying to feel more comfortable going places by yourself! Here a few of my own…
The Raven Rituals
Going to any type of music show is one of my favorite things because I get to “dress up”. For some that may be stupid because going to a show is about listening to music. I feel you. However, you can’t deny that music has its own culture within itself in terms of association. That’s why so many young kids nowadays “look” punk but don’t even know who Black Flag or the Sex Pistols are! They dress for association but don’t know its origins on why punks dressed the way they did. If you do associate and actually listen to music, there’s normally a whole culture surrounding the band or genre. Being apart of culture includes looking the part unfortunately. It’s just the way it is.
There’s no harm in dressing a certain way because you want to feel associated to that group but I highly recommend you do you research beforehand. You never know what kind of expression or message you could be sending to others if you’re unaware of what you’re wearing!
Anywho, my blog usually features outfit of the days because natural lighting is the best. During the day, my looks may not be as over the top or extra as some like to call it in comparison to night looks. There’s a whole other side of my wardrobe that I don’t particularly share because I mainly wear it at night and am usually to busy livin’ to think about photos. However, my looks at night are usually black, edgy, and I most likely have a lot of skin showing. I think my night looks show my shadow side. Would you be interested in seeing more outfits of the night? Leave a comment below if so!
For some their style is very consistent in color, “aesthetic”, shapes, and other aspects but that just aint me! My style definitely thrives off my current inspirations and that’s constantly changing. Personally, I’ve always wanted to be consistent with my style so that I could fit into whatever aesthetic I found interesting at the time. It’s super hard not to find beauty or fascination with all things due to my willingness to try anything and everything.
Although I may not dress “goth”, “punk”, “classy”, or “sporty” and fit in consistently with these styles I still have deep passions for all of them. There are people who stay inside the box and then there are those who like to wander outside it. Nothin is wrong with either one and I admire those who can stay in their style realm without getting bored easily.
Mood: Stevie Nicks
For this look, when I tried on the dress I immediately thought of Stevie Nicks. If you didn’t know, she’s one of my biggest inspirations and I absolutely adore her. The color of the dress reminds me of her album cover “The Other Side of the Mirror”. Naturally feeling in my Stevie Nicks vibes, I had to pair it with my David Bowie inspired platforms! Also, to top the outfit off, Stevie wore different types of hats and in one of her most famous photos she’s wearing a black beret! All of these little but simple elements of the look tied it perfectly together. I admit Stevie probably would’ve worn a longer dress but this is a more modernized version of her style and I’d hope she’d appreciate this look. Perfect for a Valentine’s Day party, date, or outing with the gal pals! What do you think of when looking at this outfit? Are you feeling the Stevie Nicks vibes too or something completely different?
Valentine’s Day is around the corner and as much as many people can’t stand capitalist holidays, I have to say it’s one of my favorites! The reason it’s one of my ultimate faves is because I’m quite the hopeless romantic. I love giving and recieving love. Whenever I was a young girl, my dad would always be sure to gift my sisters and I Valentine’s Day presents. It was never anything over dramatic or too extravagant but he made sure that we all had a present. He never explained why, but I’d come home from school and there’d be an assorted chocolate box and flowers waiting for me on my bed. I didn’t grow to relate Valentine’s Day with feelings of loneliness and dread like some do because of him.
Anti Valentine’s Day
In fact, I believe that the trend of Anti Valentine’s day supporters has become increasingly popular and I find it incredibly sad. If you don’t like to receive love, you’re lying to yourself! I believe people grow bitter if not shown or given love consistently throughout their lives. I’ve been there.. I know. However, I’m not saying everyone should LOVE this holiday but instead we should view it as a national day to love ourselves and one another. At the age of 16, I remember promising myself each year I would do something special but for me! I started a tradition where I would get all dolled up and go out for dinner either with friends or just myself. To this day at 25, I still do it every year. Self love is not something you can have without practicing it. Take the time for yourself and love a little! Celebrate your successes of making it this far in life regardless of what’s currently going wrong. You are experiencing. You are living. It’s time to enjoy it!
This outfit is something I’d definitely wear while going out on Valentine’s Day! I hope it gives someone inspiration to do something nice for themselves or for someone else.
Life is too short not to express yourself. If I want to go full glam to get a cup of coffee with a friend, then so be it. When you feel good, you look good. Remember that last sentence.. in that exact order! There are days where minimal effort is my mood and I can’t be bothered to think about a makeup brush let alone a lewk. Sooo with that being said, I never really know what makeup or outfit I’m wearing until I’ve tried it on and it feels right. Issa vibe, you know? You gotta feel it in your soul.
Wig vs. Extensions
In other news, did you notice I’ve changed my hair yet again? Hello! My name’s Raven and I actually work for the CIA. Lol.. just kidding! 😉 Most of the time people are curious whether my ‘latest’ hair is a wig or extensions and at this point I definitely don’t mind sharing the details. Ask away! I’ll give you the 411 sis. This time around, the blonde hair in the photos is a sew in! Can you believe it? I’m not wearing a wig?! Whaaaat? Lol.
Towards the ending of 2018, I started to gravitate more towards netural/natural hair colors. Majority of my 2018 hair colors were extremely bright, colorful, and way out of my comfort zone. It was time to retreat.. just a bit slightly with hair color. I’ve only ever been blonde once and it was for less than two weeks, but I enjoyed feeling like Barbie. Soo, Barbie has returned and is livinggggg for this hair!
It’s absolutely wild how differently people can treat you based off your hair color! For example, when I had pink hair a few said my hair was cute and that I looked magical. People seemed to think I was younger than I actually was and didn’t seem as hesitant to talk to me about my hair. Whenever I have black hair, people hardly compliment the hair and tell me I come off intimidating. Although I don’t ask for any of these opinions, feedback is a very interesting thing to receive about yourself. As long as you don’t take anything personal, it’s fine to hear it. Without the feedback, I woudn’t know which wig to wear when I don’t feel like talking to people tbh! :p I hope you’re having a good start to 2019. More things coming soon!